I’ve been the boy to my Daddy now for three years
Years which have transformed my understanding of submission and what it means to be a proud submissive in the leather fetish and kink (LFK) scene. It has also redefined what it means to live a full and balanced life.
What is absolutely clear is that living as a full-time boy would be impossible without a protocol. I think everyone attracted to the D/s life has heard of them, but there’s very little written about them. I thought I would write about ours and then invite you, gentle reader, to send yours in to Drummer so a later issue can publish selections from those received to give others ideas for their protocols. Plus, protocols are hot, as all those I am aware of have a lot about sex in them.
I’ve had a protocol to live by almost from the day my Daddy put his tag around my neck—he was very clear we were going to have one and I was going to live by it. It is exclusively my obligation to my Daddy. Part of being a good boy is having absolute trust that my Daddy knows best what I need. If I needed him to write his obligations down that would mean he doesn’t have my complete trust—and if that were true we wouldn’t be right for one another.
The protocol has changed and developed significantly over time alongside my development as a boy and the development of the incredible symbiotic bond my Daddy and I have. It has responded to problems that have come up to help me adapt my behaviour to deliver the quality of boy my Daddy deserves, and that I want to be. Because all of the obligations I have create opportunities for me to be submissive, the pleasure I get from the protocol has grown alongside my obligations.
As time has passed, many aspects of my sexual life have been given over to my Daddy to make decisions about, or for him exclusively, and without exception this has made my sexual life far richer, deeper, and hotter. It has also allowed me to develop sexual skills I didn’t think of—I get off on doing things for the first time with him, and some of them are reserved for him alone thereafter. For example, he fucks me dry, no lube, and my arse somehow makes enough mucus—but every other man has to use lube with me. Among the many benefits of this is that he can (and does) fuck me whenever he likes, wherever we might be—so I never know what’s going to happen to me next: I just have to be ready.
In the early period, my Daddy and I lived on different continents, so our protocol by design created opportunities for me to be submissive that would abstract distance and bring us together. I had a great deal of freedom sexually when we were not physically together but there was a lot of dialogue about what I would do, with who, and the documentation I would provide. For example, I was to film my sexual encounters wherever possible (with the consent of the other parties) and send them to him. Once I moved to the same city, we kept some of the daily elements—and even added some more, as it was clear that punctuating the day with submissive activities was enjoyable for him and certainly for me.
I have other obligations that create opportunities for submission throughout the day. Some examples:
• On days when I go into the office for work I’m caged and he chooses what jockstrap I’m to wear from a selection I give him the night before. I also send video check-ins during the workday.
• I send him a video I make one set day each week—either taken from video of us having sex, or me doing something sexual—practicing for depth or width with dildos or self-fisting (If you can’t fist yourself, learn how, its spectacular!)
• When either of us is out of town without the other, I’m caged the entire time, including during sleep. It’s his way of holding me all the time we’re geographically apart.
• I send a periodic check-in video or photos at other times during the day.
• If I’m to attend any LFK-related place or function, I need permission in advance and he also may attach conditions of any kind on what I can do there.
There are sections of the protocol to handle what I pack for trips we take together that covers everything I’ll wear travelling and during the trip itself and of course all aspects of my life and behaviour during those trips requires me to be a boy 24×7. There’s a section on how to prepare for, and behave, at events we attend together in New York where we both live. For example, I am to be cleaned out whenever we’re together so at any time he can fuck me (this has led to a lot of fun in random public restrooms), and also I drink all piss he makes when we’re together (this, too, has led to a lot of enjoyment in all sorts of places around the world).
The protocol also covers what isn’t in it. For example, when dating or in a non-D/s relationship with another man or men (I’m polyamorous), I am free to do whatever with them sexually I want.
It has not always been easy to balance the boundaries of my D/s life with ‘normal’ life. It can be a challenge to have to switch gears from a largely ‘alpha’ life in the normal world to submissiveness sometimes from moment to moment during the day; the process has stretched me considerably and I can still get it wrong from time to time—but the protocol has helped immeasurably keep me in the right mindset at the right times.
Submission is an amazing quality—the more you do it the better it feels and the more it gives you ideas for new ways to submit. Our protocol gives me structure to stay in a submissive mindset while allowing me room to be my ‘normal’ self in other social contexts.
Author: Boy Nikko
Photo Credit: Matt Spike